Yearning

I haven't done very well with blogging this year. It makes me sad, since I had big plans to write and share, but then life actually happened. My fingers have ached to write, but I've attempted a few times to do so and find myself hitting a wall. I try and try, then panic sets in and I'm done for the day. I love to write and I always have, but I've found that while it would seem I have so much to write about and comment on, I look at the screen and my mind goes blank. Maybe its the fear of someone not liking what I have to say.

Maybe I'm not so funny, at least not compared to the blogs that seem to have large quantities of followers. (I know I just compared my blog with others, a big 'No No!') Its hard these days to find a niche to fit in, since everybody (and I do mean everybody) thinks they can write. All the blogs I follow are amazing, I want to know more and often feel like I know them. I have run across a few that heaven help them and we'll leave it at that. I am not that great of a writer, but like all writers I want to be heard. I have dreamed of writing a bestselling Novel, but I'm 28 and I'm not seeing much of that in my future.

My Hubby and I often talk about when he becomes a Bestselling author or when I become one, about all the things we'd like to do and be able to afford to have. My Hubby is a good writer and I'm not just saying that. He always is able to write these amazing plot outlines and they are so well planned & figured out. Sit me down and nothing. Although I think my writing style is what they call a 'Grower.' Kind of sounds dirty now that I look at it. Its not however! It means my stories develop as I write, they grow like a plant would. I don't do much thinking ahead, it just happens. My blog posts kind of do the same. I wonder if it makes a story or post more exciting to have it planned or for it to just happen. Who knows?

Alright, its late and we're actually going to go to the Children's Museum tomorrow. So, I kind of need some kind of rest. You know imagine that! I'll try to get a blog post up about our Vacays this summer, because we sure had a busy summer. For those who still follow me, bear with me as I try to figure out how to balance kindergarten, a home business and life with four kids under 5. I'm going to find a way to squish writing in and maybe I'll find my way around my Writer's Block Wall. Check out my new blog, Crafty With Pixie Stedding,  for my business, where I will be showcasing super cute papercraft projects and hopefully will inspire others to want to be crafty too!

New Journeys

Kindergarten. Army. House Cleaning. Kids. This Fall has already started full and not just a little bit chaotic! As a family we are making new journeys and learning together how to move forward. Aidan started Kindergarten and boy has that thrown us all for a loop. I'm happy he's learning, if not perhaps all that comes with public school, and I'm super happy that he's learning new things, making new friends, etc. The schedule for the school is less then ideal, Noon to 2:50 Mon, Tues, Thurs, and Fri. Wed is early out day and so he has to be at school by 10 and is there til 11:50. It makes planning trips into town tricky. Point of Fact: last week we had to leave Aidan & Aislynn all day with an amazing friend so I could go to the Dr's and get groceries. (Of course every thing that could go wrong that day, did!) We're adjusting. I'm sure it takes more then a few weeks or even a month to do so, but boy, I'm ready to have life settle down.

Another new Journey began last month. I started a home business. I am now an Independent Consultant for Close To My Heart and super excited to see my business take off. I've finally purchased enough supplies to really get a chance to play with our products and of course have an excuse to be crafty! What woman needs much of an excuse for that? LOL! I'm also super nervous about this because a lot of what is needed to succeed is way, way out of my comfort zone. So, I'm trying to take big steps to overcome and do well.

I have my first Workshop/Scrapbook event this weekend and I am nervous, but excited because this can open so many doors for my business. We are making a super cute 2-page layout for Halloween and eating yummy pizza! I hope that I get a good turn out, so keep me in your prayers that I do. You want to check out my new Blog, head Here or want to check out Close To My Heart products head Here.

Changes

I can hardly believe how long its been so I blogged! My life seemed to take all kinds of crazy turns this year and now things are beginning to settle down once again. So maybe I will finally be able to blog more often. I do miss it. Although I think the break was just what I needed, I was getting a chance to enjoy my family.

Aidan started Kindergarten a week ago and seems to be really enjoying himself. Although, he still continues to hide behind myself or my Hubby every time we take him and anyone talks to him. But once he gets to class he seems to do fine and hasn't had any issues according to his teacher. I still can hardly believe my baby is in school already. I'm glad he likes it, that he's learning and that he's making friends.

Aislynn is jealous! She wants so badly to be in school with Aidan, but we keep telling her that she'll get to go next year. We've been trying to make sure that she gets some special time with each of us. My hubby took her to the library last week and picked out books & movies to share. I'm not sure what she & will do this week, but we'll come up with something.

Pixie and Fallon are growing like crazy. Fallon gives kisses and toddles around like crazy. He is so smart! Pixie causes all kinds of mischief and loves to brush everyone's hair (or Daddy's bald head)! She loves to sing her ABCs and does pretty well at it, too!

I started working from home last month. I am now an Independent Consultant for Close To My Heart! I'm super excited about being able to help contribute to our finances (in a good way) and be able to set my own schedule, as well as have a great excuse to be crafty! I'll be starting a blog soon just for my projects, I'll share it once its up and running!

My health has continued to improve, which has been a blessing. Although I still suffer from my migraines, but now we've reached the beginning of cooler weather they have decreased some and now that I know to avoid MSG & Sodium Nitrate. I'm excited to enjoy life as I continue to improve my health.

Well, I have got to run, I hear Fallon calling to me from his booster seat. He must be done with his dinner!

Writer's Workshop: The Random Things You Don't Know

I thoroughly enjoy participating in Mama Kat's weekly writer's workshops, there are always such intriguing things to write about and sometimes its just plain hard making a decision on what to write about. I often go back and use an idea later, so I get to use them all. If you ever find you're having writer's block or you just want to 'meet' new bloggers and share you're blog with others then head on over. Join in all the fun!

The Random Things You Don't Know About Me & My Family:

*I was told I'd never have kids, due to having stage 4 Endometriosis.
*While pregnant with Aislynn, I joked that I was ready to be done and a week later I went into preterm labor.
*Rhiannon is 23 months old and weighs 19lbs & Fallon is 10 months old and weighs 17lbs 15oz, Pixie fits her nickname perfectly!

*Joined the Army without my family's support, it wasn't until later that I got it.
*My Hubby & I were engaged 4 times before we actually got married, an original wedding date was Aug 10th, 2004.
*I lived in a real haunted house for 2 years and kind of liked it!
*I hope to write a book some day.
*Self taught quilter and when my Grandma passed away this last year, I inherited her very expensive, hardly been used Bernina sewing machine and serger.
*During my senior year of high school, my school was the first in Utah to perform 'Les Miserables.' I was supposed to be in it but following surgery I was only able to help with tech.
*I had major ankle surgery half way through my senior year and missed six weeks of school, and still graduated.
*I have a thing for cemeteries, I loved to take photos of them and love to wander around in them. We have to stop at at least one or two every trip.
*With the help of my Father-in-law I finally decided to incorporate my hobby of photography with my fascination of cemeteries and my love of history to study to be an archaeologist.
*I was Sterling Scholar for English & Literature when I was in High School.
*My Hubby works 60+ hours a week, so that I can stay home with our kids.
*Aidan told me the other day that 'Jesus built our TV and our house.' Which totally cracks me up, but makes things hard to explain that He did indirectly.

I had fun with this one, I think I'll do one of these every week. If I can feel well enough to do it, that is! I hope you enjoyed learning random things about me & my family!

Projects To Keep Me Sane

Well, its true. I pull out the beautiful sewing machine my Beloved Grandma left me and I get lost in the world of seams and figuring out how to do one thing or another. I love it, although I hate that I currently work on all my sewing projects on the floor between my bed and a set of bookcases. Its cramped and uncomfortable, but I still have made a few things for some clients, for friends really as I've gotten to know each of them through the process of working on each project, each gift for them. I've made two carseat covers, a set of matching burp cloths and a ruffled tote bag over the last month & a half. I've made upteen number of mistakes, unpicked a multitude of stitches, wondered more than a time or two 'Should I have done that different' and just had fun adventuring in the world of self-taught sewing. Here are some photos for you all to enjoy. I'm enjoying watching my hobby/business starting to come to life. Its a nice feeling!

The Trouble With Potty Training

Okay, fellow Mommies I am at wits end with Miss Aislynn the last two weeks and I am in desperate need of advice. We potty trained her starting about 18 months and it took some work, but we got there about 6 months later. She's had her little accidents here and there since, usually following a weekend not at home, but nothing we haven't been able to handle. But since last weekend we've had multiple accidents every day. We've tried everything I can think of, we've punished her by grounding her, sending her to time out, cold showers (not too cold with the temps we've been having) and we've tried positive reinforcement. We've offered treats, stickers, calm talks and the latest being a Princess Party after a month of no accidents. We still have had no luck and my patience & sanity are wearing thin! Does anyone have any suggestions or ideas on what to do & what it might be causing it?

Writer's Workshop: What Made Me Laugh

There is always something going on at my house that either makes you laugh hysterically or scream....hysterically! I have four kids under 5, so things can be chaotic and crazy, but boy do we have some fun things to laugh at. So my funny story for the week actually happened on Tuesday night. I was watching an episode of Lost (yes, I'm way behind the times!) and reading blogs on my laptop, when suddenly there was this weird revving buzz sound. It wasn't super loud, so I assumed it was something on my computer, I'd just opened a couple new tabs on my Internet browser, so I muted my computer and the noise stopped. I figured I'd fixed the problem and went back to what I was doing, but then I heard it again and thought, 'Man, is that a background noise on Lost?' I tried pausing the episode and still I could hear it. Then it clicked, I'd set my Hubby's ring tone on my new phone as a revving motorcycle and that was the noise I was hearing. My phone was by my feet for some reason and he'd been trying to call me. When I answered, I was laughing so hard, because I felt so dumb that I had totally forgotten his ring tone. Hurray for stupid things to laugh at to make your day!


This is courtesy of Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop! Love, love,  love this and enjoy participating when I can! Drop by her blog and join in all the fun!

Where 2013 Takes Me

I only had two goals for 2013 and really they encompass so much, that they could be headers for a multitude of mini goals. But for me its easier to just keep it at the two and see where they take me. Now mind you its two goals and  not two New Year's resolutions, because I can never seem to keep New Year's resolutions, so I felt if I made them goals maybe I'd have better results. Lol!

The first goal was to get healthy. Like I said really broad, but the plan is to get my health back on track. A big part of that is no surgeries in 2013! I'm already almost a month into the year and no plans for any surgeries (there isn't much left for them to take out! *Knock on wood!*) I have plans to lose weight and get back into shape. I've gotten kind of flabby over the last five years, you know four kids & 7 abdominal surgeries is all!

But those all kind of feel like they're on the back burner at the moment. I think my priority is to figure out what's going on with my body. I started having days with some pretty bad body aches, aches that are everywhere, but have focal points in my lower back, my hips, my knees, my neck. So bad I can't sleep and I toss & turn, crying out. My poor hubby has to endure it on the nights he's actually home, poor guy. I'm so exhausted from poor sleep, but a general drained out feeling. So I had some x-rays done of my one knee and I'll be doing some blood work this week. My Dr is checking for any autoimmune diseases and osteoarthritis. And if nothing pops up there, then it may mean I have Fibromyalgia. Something my Dad was diagnosed with some time ago. So everybody keep me in your prayers!

My other goal is to be a better me!  I know, I know. Another very broad goal, but its a valid one. I want to become a better mommy, wife, student, quilter, writer and just a better me! I want to feel more comfortable with who I am. All the time I've been sick and even now while I have more bad days then good, I have drawn into myself and become a recluse. I hate it! I used to have fun and want to be out doing fun things. I want to be the fun mom who takes my kids to do fun things. I want to be the wife who romances the socks off my hubby and doesn't have to be taken care of all the time. I just want to be a better me!

Anyway, those are my goals. We'll see where 2013 takes me!

I Still...

Alive! If barely. On top of the wonderful Holiday season, I have been plagued by post-op pains, strep, a nasty cold and migraines! I'm ready to be done and start my New Year! So, I proof I'm alive and here's to posting Christmas photos in the next day or so. Love to you all!